a n i m a t i o n . w o r d s & p i c t u r e s . f o r u m

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Alien Clown Spammers

Posted by: Josh

I was happy to find out that people out in e-mail land also e-mail SPAMmers back, that I'm not just some crazy freak. A while back someone spoofed with a fucksociety e-mail address, and we got all the irate hate mail.

From what I understand, spoofing is the term used when a SPAMmer hides his or her e-mail while spamming you. So, if you reply, you could be sending death threats to some innocent clown/pedophile, or to an e-mail that doesn't exist at all. Usually you can tell which is a SPAM from a large, money-making company, and which are just some dipshit who got made fun of a lot in school who thinks people will like him if he SPAMs them.

The dead giveaway is in presentation, a poorly grammared SPAM, with bad.php links that don't work, and smiley's is not likely to be someone spoofing, and very well that is their personal everyday e-mail. So, watch for those signs, one I got recently went something like this...

Subject: Interesting sites
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 10:25:32

"Hello, I recommend you to read this sites and sign the guestbook:
*insert a bunch of dumb links about Greece and Greek Mythology here*
P.S. Please tell me what you think and which of them you find best :) You can email me to the ad poseidon@mail.vu (Do not just hit reply)"

Alright, I took his "recommendation" and clicked on the links, and I tell ya, I could give a shit what the sites are about, honestly I don't even remember, my main concern was with the SPAM. (Note: In this SPAM war, I will be played by Mr. T.)

Subject: Re: Interesting Sites
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 10:57:18

"wow, can you guess how much I hate you now? I'll give you hint: it's a lot. Your sites are shitty, I wouldnt take the time to sign your guestbook to tell you that you obviously enjoy giving fellatio to large animals, so here it is in e-mail form. Go suck a donkey-cock you inbred, spamming motherfucker"

That's all you need: just insult their masculinity, most men will run for the hills...or beat the sweet jebus out of you, so thank god for the anonymity of the internet! 'Cause I couldn't beat up an unconscious 8-year old girl, even if I caught her off guard. Well, little did I know, this was no man, but AN ALIEN! This was truly a surprise, watch now, as we get treated to some actual dumbfuck-dialect.

Subject: Re: Interesting sites
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 12:29:08

"R U 11 OR 12 YEARS OLD???"

Hush now, I think he is trying to communicate! We must find some common ground between our two languages before we can come to a true understanding of one another.

Subject: dipshits who spam me
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 12:29:08

"Was that supposed to be an insult or a comeback of some sort? Cause I missed it, maybe your mouth was full of some giant, throbbing donkey-meat. well, here's my retort......

Y R U SPAMMING ME? I H8 U, LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

Well, I'm new at this, I think my point was pretty clear. Unfortunately, the dipshit has more free time on his hands than I do, his replies were quick. And stupid, very stupid.

Subject: Re: dipshits who spam me
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 12:43:57

"Even If you didn't like the sites you could tell me why or erase the message. I think you're highly uncivilised and the crap you write (felatios shits donkeys etc.) is because you take and example of yourself. Where RU from???"

Tsk, tsk, that wasn't very nice -

Subject: another glorious comeback from the dipshit patrol
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 13:06:25

"Half the links didnt work, which is a piss-off that I even took the time to try. As far as erasing it goes: I e-mail back every reject who SPAMs me, are you aware that it's illegal and right fucking annoying? AS far as being uncivilized goes: SUCK MY LEFT NUT! who the fuck are you to tell me Im not being civilized to some dumb asshole who SPAMs me? You don't deserve civility, you deserve a donkey-cock. Kindly leave me alone......dipshit"

I thought I'd gotten him with that one. A few times I just had to say "SPAM is illegal, eat lead lawbreaker" and they go away. Not my alien friend, oh no! He just needed a break. I like how upset he gets in this next one, heh heh, THREE QUESTION MARKS!

Subject: Re: another glorious comeback from the dipshit patrol
Date: Fri, 06 Apr 2001 01:38:02

"Which links didn't work??? From wherever I have browsed them (Germany, Greece, UK) always work; Which country do you live and where are you from originally? Your name seem to be Georgian"

Heh heh, really freaked him out telling him the links didn't work, dirty fucker. To explain that Georgian/name thing, my e-mail name was Lywood Haruntzi for a while. Long story, not important, let's make fun of the man from another planet some more.

Subject: stupid asshole needs to get a life
Date: Fri, 06 Apr 2001 01:58:45

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL E-MAILING ME?"

Subject: 13 years old cry baby needs to get a friend
Date: Fri, 6 Apr 2001 04:06:18

"...just go to hell; By the way I am Greek. why don't you say your nationality???"

The straw that broke the dinkus' back. I brought him down to my level. Well that was validation enough for me, but he called me a cry baby!!!. Unacceptable..

Subject: this is it
Date: Fri, 06 Apr 2001 01:58:45

"IM ONE FUCKING HUNDRED PERCENT, PURE BRED, ALL-AMERICAN DONKEY! NOW GET ON YOUR KNEES AND SUCK MY COCK!

you seem to understand english well enough, but it seems that whole "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE" thing kinda slipped through, huh?
Next time I'm in Greece, I'm hunting you down motherfucker! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"

CLICK HERE TO KILL SPAM

SPAM HIM!! He Killed Mr.-fucking-T!!!
Please be sure to fill his inbox to the brim, so I can feel satisfied that another dumb SPAMmer was sent back to hell. So kids, take a lesson from Mr. T: DON'T DRINK MILK!!!

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